critically acclaimed

the list of bad habits get's a scapegoat

well i guess it is official. football season starts for me around and about today. granted the season won't actually start happening for another month or so but that doesn't mean the fanatical drunken rampages can't start now right? i mean i need something to explain my frequent sunday binge/blackout phases and liver disease. i could blame it on god but i would probably just piss all the right-wingers off so i will refrain from that bizarre nature. no what i mean is that training camp started for my beloved Packers today (http://www.packerstrainingcamp.com). with this momentous occasion starting for me i can do one of many things that i highly enjoy.

here is my list of things that make the start of football season so great...

1. Public Alcoholism (because everyone in green bay comes to watch them practice whilst drinking a beer, hell even family vacations promote that)
2. Arguing with Random Strangers about Football (always fun to watch and do as well)
3. Drinking on Sundays (not like i needed an excuse i just like placing the blame somewhere else and football is way better than this thing my friend's are calling addiction)
4. Fantasy Footbal and Football Pools (i also have a small gambling problem....but only small)
5. More Consumption of Meat (football is kind of like religion and therefore some animals need to be sacrificed to the Brett Favre god's so that he won't throw any more interceptions this year)
6. Less Time Spent with Women (football gives me an excuse to burp, fart, scratch, yell loudly, and drink excessively at events i can't possibly control without the interuption of any women within 5 miles)
7. It Makes Me Think About Less About Important Things and More About Not-So-Important Things (self explanatory)
8. Football is my only source of national pride (what can i say, i don't like god, i don't like guns, i'm for gay marriage i.e. i don't fit with the majority right now)
9. The SuperBowl (the even better reason to drink on a sunday than it being just a normal week....it's practically a national holiday)
10. Large Men Hitting Each Other (always fun....i just wish it involved more monkeys)

that is about it folks or maybe i just skimmed the top of the list. remember i come from wisconsin where my love for my packers has been bred into me. i came out of the womb as a Packer fan. i could make a whole list of why i love the Packers. just remember when they show fans during football games. whose fans are always without their shirts off......in negative degree weather? that's right eat me rest of the NFL. ok i have said my peace. GAME ON!

posted by critically acclaimed @ 2:20 PM