critically acclaimed

forgot to name a post because of artistic differences with the artist

i haven't done a free association post in a long time. usually i come in with varying degrees of subject matter to splatter across the page but today i don't. i just wanted to pontificate in between thoughts, functions, and beliefs or better stated my attempt to kill time. i got into a long discussion with a friend today about the future and more importantly where/what the fuck we are both going to be doing. being the big shot that i am i feel like i have a handle on my future but i would be lying. i do that a lot. what struck me about this conversation is that again i am at the throes of another milestone in my life. grad school is going to be hard but i am about to finish something that is impressive. my college days. i'm done. i'm gone. i have no liver. not much else can be said for losing the days of my supposed youth to slim words and bad health problems. it seems like just yesterday i was a pip squeak freshmen learning to play quarters with Beast Lite and looking around for as much cheap vodka as possible to forget feelings.

to say i matured and "grown up" would be a lie. i haven't and i don't know when that supposed day will be but it happening now. i am still a procrastinator but i can handle tons and tons of responsibility. i am lost and confused regardless of how much i know about what i am going to do with the rest of my life. yet, i'm not complaining. i don't pity myself or my situation. i have made mistakes and a lot of them but i don't care anymore. i have made people mad and i have done some bad things but i could care less right now because every battle scar and paralyzing belief has been showcased prominently on my sleeve for all to see. now i just put a little more inside myself and live within my own world. i have succeeded only in places where i feel i needed to.

changing paces. gonna be putting up a lot of reviews and articles in the coming weeks. i am writing for our school newspaper and i feel like writing more lately. currently listening to Yellowcard's new album Lights and Sounds. will have that review up soon but other keeping fighting. peace.

posted by critically acclaimed @ 6:42 PM